Transparent Thoughts. 

*I wrote this post last night after a rough and emotional day, but I’m posting it a day later – for reference while you’re reading. 😉 
Today was a hard day.

We’ve had help for the past two weeks since my surgery and it has been so very nice. Tomorrow is officially the two week mark and today was maybe one of the hardest emotionally. As my body is feeling better physically, I am having to force myself to still not do too much and continue to rest. I can’t lift my elbows higher than my hips- think about that when your trying to use your arms tomorrow- to get into the refrigerator, open a car door, put on a seatbelt, open a cabinet door, get in and out of bed, flush the toilet, pull up my pants, reach over to pick up a glass of water on the beside table, put on a shirt that doesn’t button up or just put my arms through a shirt in general- I can’t do any of these things, and so much more that I can’t even think of right now, without help from someone. Sometimes, I try to push it and open the car door myself or flush the toilet and I immediately regret my decision because of the pain that happens. There are so many movements that I don’t even think about not being able to do until I try and forget that I can’t right now. It’s frustrating and today it got the best of me.

Someone recently told me that week 3 and 4 were harder than the first 2 weeks because of this problem. My pain is managed pretty well at this point, but I still can’t do anything to “help” myself around the house. Emotionally, it’s very frustrating. I’m trying to remain positive and trust me I am so optimistic and I know that this is only a small set back. Tomorrow I’ll be back to my optimistic self and not be as down about this, but today was just blah. I slept until 11:00, woke up and Steven made me eat so I did that, attempted to play with John then just watched Steven and John play- he had so much fun, wrote a blog post and some thank you notes, attempted to read, listened to a podcast instead, and then fell asleep again around 5 because I was just so frustrated with not being able to do anything.

Here are a few pictures to explain my life right now… Basement bouncy house fun!

Books I’m reading/attempting to read- not pictured is my Book Club book on my Kindle: Dear Mr. Knightley and the book I need to finish before I start reading that one and it’s pretty good, The One in a Millon Boy by: Monica Wood

…and then three real lie pictures of the mess that is our bedroom! We brought in a love seat recliner from our basement to put in our bedroom so I’d have another place to sit other than our bed, it has been nice!

On the flip side, sleep has been ok. Better than I thought it would be. I originally thought I would not ever get any sleep because sleeping on my back would be so difficult, but thankfully it’s not so bad and I think the pain meds help some too. Here are a few pictures of my sleep situation if you need a giggle or too. It’s pretty comical.

*The second picture was last week when I went to the salon and got a blowout, if you know me you know I love some voluminous hair so OF COURSE I brought my own rollers left with them still in my hair! I had to remind my stylist how to put in Velcro rollers because she hasn’t done it in such a long time, we had a good laugh about it. I even napped in them and it wasn’t so bad either! Turns out airplane pillows are good for post-surgery too! 
That’s all for today- sorry for the pity party, it’s 10:45 now and I’m already feeling better. I know days like this will happen and that’s OK! Before I know it, I’ll be back to my usual self and as good as new! In the meantime I’m very thankful for all the help we do have here. Friends and family, y’all are such a blessing to Steven, John, and me. We couldn’t have survived these two weeks without you!!

Love you all so very much!!